It is said out of sight out of mind.
But I think if it meant nothing to begin with then it’s easier to let go.
I. I miss how my flesh rubbed against yours, it’s warmth as we slept assured me of your presence.
Like the sensation of swinging back and forth that inventor was by far my favorite.
See they molded this invention as an example of purity and love.
This up and down, back and forth and if your on too long your hind legs begin to stiff.
You and I were alot like that. You remind me of a sunset.
You glow and when you enter oh does the entire room knows it.
Being with you I hope would remind me how to be with another.
I want to feel as through my lack of experience won’t drive him away.
I want to wake up to a face I’m shock wants me. And hide my blushing cheeks under the blanket to allow my ears to hear his breathing.
He’s breathing my air, and I’m breathing his.
His moans I adore because they are from me, for me.
I want to trust our union and feel better than enough.
I want to show him off, showing me off.
I want to be able to throw him birthday parties and he looks at me like “babe .” And he does not throw away my attempt as if I didn’t drop such advance hints that a blind man could read.
I want his heart. The way I do anything he reads me, through I pretend to hate it.
But I am nowhere near that at the present time so I pick up my phone.
One digit at a time I put your number in the dial space.
All I have to do is click phone…
But I won’t.
Because your not you.
You don’t miss me.
I recall a guy saying these words “men know what they want. Doesn’t matter if he’s a player, a douche, a dog, a coward, whatever. In the end if he’s not willing to fight for you, then he doesn’t want you, not really. He wouldn’t waste his time he would make it plain.”
And then I remembered all those great songs, I can’t make you a man, I won’t beg you, and I can’t make you love me.
So I left the phone app and played Klondike I needed to feed the cows anyway.